Who can give you the strength to materialize your goals in life?
Your father.
When you think of your father, you may notice that certain feelings or sensations arise within you. Take a moment to tune into them, and see if they are similar to the sensations that come up for you when you need to assert yourself in the world, for example when you need to set boundaries or stand your ground.
Bert Hellinger observed that the person most excluded in families is the father.
After your mother, the most important bond for your wellbeing is with your father. When, at the soul level, we are missing our father, we lack a special strength that helps us in life and can only come through him. For example, if your father was not present physically or emotionally, or your mother did not allow you to have access to him, by rejecting him or speaking negatively about him, you may have grown up rejecting him.
We tend to see our father through our mother’s eyes and are loyal to her opinion about our father.
When we reject our father (complain, reproach him, blame him, etc.) it is felt as if we are rejecting part of ourselves, as if half of us is not worthy (of love, success, fulfillment in life, etc.) and we feel an inner void that we will always try to fill with external things. Such is the case with many addictions.
Taking our father into our heart, healing the wounds that we had as children and integrating him is a deep inner process that each of us needs to go through if we want to succeed in life. It is not always easy because each of us has a different challenge, a different wound and each journey towards our dad is unique. By taking the journey, we open the door to the masculine energy in its purest form and we integrate its qualities within us that will help us with how we are in the world.
Why is healing the father wound important?
Healing the father wound can help you with the following:
- Overcoming difficulties in your life
- Making decisions
- Setting boundaries
- Gaining clarity, logical and mathematical thinking
- How you allow others to treat you
- Independence, identity and self-esteem
- Beginning new things such as projects, relationships, changing jobs, moving, etc.
By healing the father wound, and taking him into our hearts, just as he was, we gain the fortitude to go into the world, take our place in it, and with the people and situations that come into our lives. Also, to reach personal and professional fulfillment, we need to integrate our father in us.
“If mom is the gateway to life, dad is the portal to the world.”
– Marina Toledo
Are you ready to begin the journey to take your father into your heart?
Join us for my upcoming Healing the Father Wound Online Training Module or register for a Family Constellations Online Workshop or go deeper in my Family Constellations Online Trainings.
